Andrew Sims: The Man, the Myth, the Legend
by Elysa on May.23, 2010, under Announcements
May 23rd doesn’t get enough press. At least, not for the right reasons. Most people know it as the day Napoleon was crowned King of Italy, or the start of the Mexican-American war, or the day Nazi Nutbag Heinrich Himmler committed suicide, or perhaps as International World Turtle Day.
Consequently, too few people grasp its true significance. Too few people understand the magnitude of this date, the utter cosmic totality of its passing. For on this day 21 years ago, evolution reached its pinnacle. All that ever was, from the Big Bang to now, culminated in the birth of Andrew Sims.
I speak for everyone when I say that, without Andrew, none of us would be here with you today. Well fine, maybe – maybe – we would still exist as people, but not as the insanely awe-inspiring podcasters you know us as. It was his vision and talent that started all of these (somewhat disturbing) shows, from MuggleCast to SmartMouths, so the next time we mortally offend your every mature sensibility you can go ahead and thank him.
No seriously. Don’t look at us.
We, as a group, as a dynamic, would not exist without him. Not only because it was his passion for broadcasting and entertainment that initiated this entire shitstorm, but because he believed in the rest of us. He made a name for himself early on, and had his pick of people to share the limelight with. He’s visited movie sets, interviewed New York Times Best-Selling authors, sat down at tables with Hollywood producers and devised History-Making book discussions. He could have shared that with anybody, could have chosen to do his show(s) with anyone. But he chose us. He believed in us. He showed us the ropes, exhibited Saintlike patience throughout, and most impressively, befriended us along the way. He is one of the truest friends in recorded history – I mean seriously, it’s a little fucking sickeningly sweet sometimes – and defines what it is to be fiercely loyal, understanding, and genuine.
When I first met him, five years ago this summer, my first thought was… okay, truthfully it was “how do I tap that?” But then it was, “he’s just so grotesquely easy to like!” And to some degree, to those who know him best, that sums him up perfectly: He’s just one of those people that could run over your cat and you’d invite him in for tea and scones. Maybe that makes him a wizard. But I like to believe that’s just the charisma, the open charm and easy humor he so naturally displays, both professionally and personally. Many of us owe some of our best experiences and memories to his unabashed willingness to selflessly share his own. So much of what we get to do is because of him, and so much of what we know about friendship is due to him.
But above all, even greater than any of those things combined, is his penchant for school hallway pants-shitting. I mean let’s be honest, that’s the real reason we like him.
Happy birthday Andrew, you scintillating piece of man meat! We love you!
39 Comments for this entry
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May 23rd, 2010 on 7:05 PM
Wow, that was beautiful… I wish I had a friend like him too !
Happy Birthday Andrew!
May 23rd, 2010 on 7:07 PM
Aww, the awesome is just overflowing in that … Hugs, love & high-fives!
May 23rd, 2010 on 7:07 PM
Andrew Happy Birthday, We Love You!
May 23rd, 2010 on 7:12 PM
happy birthday, you crazy motherfucker!
May 23rd, 2010 on 7:16 PM
lol, love it! happy birthday!
May 23rd, 2010 on 7:19 PM
Wow, that is an incredible write-up Elysa!! Hilarious! I love how you express yourself through words
And, how could I forget, Happy Birthday Andrew! 
May 23rd, 2010 on 7:33 PM
*clapps hands* amazingy said, Elysa.
Happy B-day, Andrew!
May 23rd, 2010 on 7:42 PM
But above all, even greater than any of those things combined, is his penchant for school hallway pants-shitting. I mean let’s be honest, that’s the real reason we like him.
May 23rd, 2010 on 7:50 PM
Happy birthday Sims. And tomorrow’s is Alex Carpenter’s!
May 23rd, 2010 on 8:13 PM
That was incredible. Nice job Elysa!
May 23rd, 2010 on 9:12 PM
Wow..made me laugh, made me cry..t’was beautiful
May 23rd, 2010 on 9:13 PM
Happy Birthday Andrew! You’re the man. It’s been great to listen to you for the past few years and I really admire your talent and dedication to the podcasts.
And Elysa you are an awesome writer. I loled. Especially at the pants-shitting thing hahaha.
May 23rd, 2010 on 9:19 PM
That was the greatest thing I’ve ever read.
Elysa, screw politics, you should become an author.
May 23rd, 2010 on 11:19 PM
Happy 21st Birthday Andrew!!!
Hope you enjoy legal binge drinking!
Oh and Elysa, you are fucking epic!
May 24th, 2010 on 12:27 AM
Happy Birthday Andrew. I know this is coming about an hour too late but I just want you to know…
I’d still Tap that <3
May 24th, 2010 on 1:11 AM
Aww, that was so sweet and funny, Happy 21st Birthday, Andrew!
May 24th, 2010 on 2:44 AM
I LOVE YOU ANDREW
JE T’AIME ANDREW
TE QUIERO ANDREW
BAHIBBAK ANDREW
<3
May 24th, 2010 on 7:47 AM
Elysa, you are a genius! You’re so good with words. And Andrew deserves it. He’s awesome!
But really Elysa maybe you should think about writing the book: ‘Andrew Sims: the Man, the Myth, the Legend’. I think lots of people would love to read it!
May 24th, 2010 on 7:54 AM
Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hope you had a great day
Probably one of the very few essay length writing that i actually enjoy!!!!
Andrew and Elysa are both pure genius!
May 24th, 2010 on 8:11 AM
Happy BIRTHDAY!!!
May 24th, 2010 on 8:33 AM
And to achieve all of that before 21, that takes determination! Happy birthday, Andrew, you are very lucky to have Elysa as a friend.
May 24th, 2010 on 9:07 AM
HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYYYYY(:
i know its late
May 24th, 2010 on 9:16 AM
Happy Birthday Andrew!!! Hope you enjoy it! Its your 21st birthday so go out and have your first alcoholic drink (NOT, you’ve probably had many before lol).
May 24th, 2010 on 10:11 AM
Happy birthday Andrew!
And Elysa, that was perhaps the best birthday tribute I have ever read!
May 24th, 2010 on 10:27 AM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I wish we all had friends like yo.. wait, what am I saying?! Have a good one
x
p.s don’t think of this as late, think of it as super early for next year
May 24th, 2010 on 12:58 PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANDREW! Thanks for your passion for Podcasting or we’d never have such fantastic insights into the worlds greatest books (as well as SM)!
P.s. Hey did you send personal “Thank yous” to everyone who wished you a Happy Birthday on Twitter? Because if you did I’m heart broken you didnt tweet back to mine
May 24th, 2010 on 3:20 PM
That was filled to the brim with FUCKYEAH
May 24th, 2010 on 4:08 PM
happy birthday andrew
and elysa that was beutiful
May 24th, 2010 on 5:33 PM
Happy Birthday Andrew!!(I know I’m a day late but sorry) May 23rd is my birthday too!!! Wish you the best on your 21st.
May 25th, 2010 on 12:06 AM
hola amigos!
May 25th, 2010 on 1:11 PM
Happy Belated 21st! Hope you had such a great night you don’t remember what happened (lets be honest, that all one can hope for on the 21st)! All of your time and energy has gotten me through many a rough days at the office and I appriciate all you do! Hope you’re having an ammaaazzzinnng week and a great time in Vegas!
May 25th, 2010 on 1:58 PM
Elysa,
Your writing skills are so good, I simultaneously fell in love with you AND Andrew while reading this article. =P Happy birthday Andrew!
May 25th, 2010 on 6:46 PM
Oh so true . . . it was also around this time 5 years ago that I got Andrew Fever and its still going strong. Happy Birthday Andrew! Sims Fan 4 Life!
May 26th, 2010 on 12:04 PM
Ever consider a career in journalism?
x
May 26th, 2010 on 10:30 PM
(I am not the Isa from the first comment, I am another Isa! Yes there is more than one. Gasp.)
Happy Birthday Andrew!!
Very nicely written, Elysa!!
May 28th, 2010 on 5:53 PM
Before I even noticed the “By”, I immedietly knew this was Elysa’s work. Bravo! After all, it takes one to know one, right? I really SHOULD go into how goddess-like the aforementioned madam is, JUST to piss off Mr. Sims by stealing his thunder. But he deserves more than that, does he not?
….At least today.
Happy Late Birthday, Andrew! You’ve been one of the voices in my head for many years and, as creepy and disturbed sounding that is, I appreciate you for it! To many more. <3
May 28th, 2010 on 5:56 PM
Wow! That was beautiful, Elysa!
Almost as beautiful as that “scintillating piece of man meat”, whom I wish a very happy, belated birthday!!
May 29th, 2010 on 3:32 AM
Screw Matt/Andrew and Matt/Elysa, where’s the Andrew/Elysa love??? We could call them Anysa and make banners and icons and fanfics and fake facebook accounts in which they proclaim their love for each other daily and ZOMG it would be soooooooooooooooooOoOoO awesome!!!one1
Hehe. Happy birthday Andrew, can’t wait to hear the censored recap of your celebrations on SmartMouths. Hope you had a fantastic time!
May 29th, 2010 on 9:42 AM
Wow great writing Elysa ! That was perfect ! Happy (late) birthday Andrew ! Thanks for all you do youre humor has gotten me through some pretty rough times. Thanks
We love you !