Smart Mouths Podcast

Which podcasts can knowledgeably (or not so knowledgeably) debate the voices of Kermit the Frog versus Fozzy Bear, which McDonald’s character is gay, Middle East politics, and baseball all in one show? Seriously, not many. Luckily we’re a bunch of idiots who have a lot to say on a variety of topics…and you get to listen. Join Andrew, Greg, Matt, Micah and Penny for the latest episode of your favorite trainwreck of a podcast, Smart Mouths!

In this episode:
-RIP, Rue McLanahan
-Perfect baseball game ruined by an ump. Boo!
-Middle East expository
-Sinkhole in Guatamala
-Formspring Fun Segment!
-One long backwash…but such a nice one
-WTF news is back!

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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Apparently the death threats have been starting to come in…we’ve been warned that if we don’t release an episode soon our lives will be cut short. Chill out, peeps, we’ve got one for you! It’s a short(er) episode, but no less exciting.
In this episode:
-Andrew’s Birthday…and the story of the stripper…and Andrew’s Eulogy.
-We play an awesome listener created song!
-RIP Gary Coleman…another child star gone to soon:(
-Elena Kagan- her nomination may bring about an interesting trend on the Supreme Court
-BP oil spill: Environmental Catastrophe: Ya think?
-TV Finales Galore
-Don’t Ask Don’t Tell on its way to being repealed and Elysa fangirls the president a little
-Backwash: John Green, our horrid pronunciations, and a special follow up to an email from a long time ago.

Thanks for listening, See ya in June!!

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May 23rd doesn’t get enough press. At least, not for the right reasons. Most people know it as the day Napoleon was crowned King of Italy, or the start of the Mexican-American war, or the day Nazi Nutbag Heinrich Himmler committed suicide, or perhaps as International World Turtle Day.

Consequently, too few people grasp its true significance. Too few people understand the magnitude of this date, the utter cosmic totality of its passing. For on this day 21 years ago, evolution reached its pinnacle. All that ever was, from the Big Bang to now, culminated in the birth of Andrew Sims.

I speak for everyone when I say that, without Andrew, none of us would be here with you today. Well fine, maybe – maybe – we would still exist as people, but not as the insanely awe-inspiring podcasters you know us as. It was his vision and talent that started all of these (somewhat disturbing) shows, from MuggleCast to SmartMouths, so the next time we mortally offend your every mature sensibility you can go ahead and thank him.

No seriously. Don’t look at us.

We, as a group, as a dynamic, would not exist without him. Not only because it was his passion for broadcasting and entertainment that initiated this entire shitstorm, but because he believed in the rest of us. He made a name for himself early on, and had his pick of people to share the limelight with. He’s visited movie sets, interviewed New York Times Best-Selling authors, sat down at tables with Hollywood producers and devised History-Making book discussions. He could have shared that with anybody, could have chosen to do his show(s) with anyone. But he chose us. He believed in us. He showed us the ropes, exhibited Saintlike patience throughout, and most impressively, befriended us along the way. He is one of the truest friends in recorded history – I mean seriously, it’s a little fucking sickeningly sweet sometimes – and defines what it is to be fiercely loyal, understanding, and genuine.

When I first met him, five years ago this summer, my first thought was… okay, truthfully it was “how do I tap that?” But then it was, “he’s just so grotesquely easy to like!” And to some degree, to those who know him best, that sums him up perfectly: He’s just one of those people that could run over your cat and you’d invite him in for tea and scones. Maybe that makes him a wizard. But I like to believe that’s just the charisma, the open charm and easy humor he so naturally displays, both professionally and personally. Many of us owe some of our best experiences and memories to his unabashed willingness to selflessly share his own. So much of what we get to do is because of him, and so much of what we know about friendship is due to him.

But above all, even greater than any of those things combined, is his penchant for school hallway pants-shitting. I mean let’s be honest, that’s the real reason we like him.

Happy birthday Andrew, you scintillating piece of man meat! We love you!

HOLY HELLBASKET, John Green is on Smart Mouths?! Hath hell frozen over? Does Penny love Oprah? Does Elysa hate Glambert? Because this is some earth-shattering, paradigm-shifting, apocalyptic stuff. I repeat: John Green – THE John Green, a legit author, viral phenomenon extraordinaire – is on the show this week to discuss his book Will Grayson, Will Grayson.

Wait – this doesn’t mean we’re earning credibility, does it? No? Okay good.

• We open the book discussion with a few standard questions – the only time in this interview where we aren’t actively making asses of ourselves.
  
• Discussion of the Epic as Hell (minus the fire-and-brimstone) novel is very thematic, with particular focus on the interconnectedness of truth and love.
  
• Penny pays Elysa the most profound compliment of her life. And that includes the time Matt called her his ho.
  
• Also: How can we be fabulous? John answers with his usual Jedi-like wisdom and wit.
  
• Last Words with John Green: A new game in which we guess what celebrities’ last words will be. Up on the pyre: Bill Clinton, Lady Gaga, Barney the Dinosaur… yeah, we go there.
  

For the whole three people out there who haven’t heard of John the Wise and/or read his novels, check him out. You won’t be disappointed, unless you’ve got a pet peeve against killer writing skillz. His website is http://www.sparksflyup.com/, his awesome youtube is http://www.youtube.com/vlogbrothers and he’s @realjohngreen over on Twitter.

And in special thanks to John for making an appearance on our (let’s be honest) less-than-inspiring production, we’re asking our listeners to donate to his charity of choice: The American Red Cross Nashville Relief Fund . For our part, we’ve already donated $200 – a figure John has graciously offered to match – so let’s play a philanthropic game of Follow the Leader, shall we? Donate Here. Come on now. Don’t be a bitchsqueeler.

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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In honor of episode 60 we had our first LIVE show in a long time! Thanks to Andrew, Greg, Matt, Micah and Penny for this great streaming episode!

-We try (again) to discuss the UK election results….and fail miserably.
-Texting during Sex? 1/10 think its ok.
-Virtual Pitcher gets $1M for a perfect game
-Boycotting Arizona….maybe it’s time to boycott MORE states.
-Net Neutrality- Andrew and Greg discuss…everyone else tries not to drool while they’re sleeping.
-Backwash is Gleeful again…OY.
-Google that Shiz…..with a few twists.
-Listener Calls!

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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Hey All! We made a last minute decision to have a LIVE SHOW for our 60th Episode. The show will be held tonight (Thursday, May 6) at 10 PM EST.

NOTE 1: Enjoy this useful Time Zone Converter to help figure out when the show will air in your neck of the woods.

NOTE 2: If you’re in the UK, you will BE UP ANYWAY since you will want to find out the results of your important election that was held today.

UPDATE: You will be able to listen to the show at this link: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/smart-mouths-live%21

We had a great time recording the show this week and we’re sure you’ll have a great time listening. Join Andrew, Elysa, Micah and Penny for a supremely excellent rendition of the Smart Mouths Podcast.

In this episode:
-Announcements cover a John Green, Laura T, and the announcement that the FINAL DATE TO ORDER SMART MOUTHS T-SHIRTS IS MAY 21, 2010
-Sandra Bullock in the news again: she got herself a cute little baby…and we didn’t even know!
-New York Times Square bomb scare!
-Oil Spill in the Gulf of Mexico
-Apple gossip
-The 2010 Time 100 List
-Screw, Marry, Kill returns and its a themed week!
-Backwash gets heated. We’re not gonna lie. Topic of argument: GLEE. Even Matt makes an appearance and he isn’t even on the show
-WTF News covers bees, eels, pigs, dogs, and grandmas.

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-Announcements about Facebook fanning, t-shirts, @realjohngreen and Audible
– Matt breaks the show down into domestic vs. international
- Sandra Bullock’s husband’s mistress, the SEC and PORN, Ben “sex-offender” Roethlisberger…
- …Immigration Law, Finance Reform, Hitler and Boob Protests
- Plus, what’s France’s deal with Muslim women’s attire and how one girl stung by a deadly jellyfish survived the encounter
- We debut a new segment: Drunk or Kid
- Backwash covers stranded volcano people and NASA funding (Elysa gets a hard-on)
- WTF News: iPad thieves, cookbook misprints, hidden TNT barrels and penile Indonesian military bans

While youtube still has it up, enjoy our Hitler Video.

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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Well what do you know? We came back for another week. How could we not? We have a free platform to spew our ridiculous opinions here. Join Andrew, Elysa, Micah and Penny for a ginormous episode of Smart Mouths.
In this week’s show:
-Andrew plays us a piece of music that brings tears to our eyes. Literally.
-Elysa makes a sentimental speech
-Virginia writes some revisionist history
-Volcanic ash caused UK flight bans. This in turn causes Andrew and Elysa to fight with Penny about the ramifications.
-The UK general elections are coming up in May. We play an important game to educate ourselves and all of you about that country and its Parliament.
-NBC doing poorly. This time not because of the Leno/Conan debacle but the Winter Olympics.
-25 years till NASA goes to Mars? Elysa (our resident NASA fangirl) is ecstatic!
-Dr. Smart Mouths makes its return and tackles graduations, home schooling and the prom.
-Backwashes address iPods in class and Team LoCo.
-WTF news. Two Words: Killer Boobs (and not the good kind.)

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Hey Hey! Back to a large panel this week for Smart Mouths. You know it was QUITE the episode when we had to delete offensive material within the first five minutes of recording! Join Andrew, Greg, Matt, Micah and Penny for this truly wonderful podcast this week.

In this episode:
-29 West Virginian coal miners were killed when their mine exploded.
-Constance McMillon was sent to a fake prom. There are some pretty horrible people in the world.
-The Polish President and his entourage were killed in a plane crash
-Justice John Paul Stevens is stepping down from the US Supreme Court. Sadly, Elysa hasn’t gone to law school yet to replace him. Matt has a good idea though.
-Weekly sports recap
-Conan is moving to TBS…hear our thoughts.
-We pretty much crucified the Catholic Church (pun intended). Sorry, but we were cruel.
-Matt is back, therefore Google that SHIZZZZ is too.
-Backwashes were short and sweet
-WTF news was severely effed up and Greg was honored to have his home town make the cut.

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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