Smart Mouths Podcast

Smart Mouths #65: Fo’ Shizzle

by Penny on Jun.22, 2010, under Episodes

Dude. I’m getting tired of writing something witty (or pretending to write something witty when you and I both know it’s not witty at all) in the paragraphs before the show summaries. I’m gonna take a stand and not write anything else in this paragraph and if anyone has an issue with it too bad. Kay? KAY?

In this week’s show:
-T-shirt update (don’t get excited)
-Announcement about July
-Rahm Emanuel- he really didn’t make news but we discussed him anyway.
-Faisal Shahzad (dubbed fo’ shizzle by Micah) pled guilty for the attempted Times Square bombing.
-True Blood returned.
-Our Summer Movie Blockbuster series has returned and we review Toy Story 3 and Karate Kid….and….Matt gives us a review of Eclipse!
-Speaking of Eclipse…we want Micah to see it…on a date…hmm.
-Backwash covers Lady GaGa (and Micah throws a fit) and Soccer (and Greg throws a fit).
-Dr. Smart Mouths returns!
-WTF News covers whales, feces, and cocaine soup packets

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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Smart Mouths #64: How Can I Get Rid Of The Stains?

by Penny on Jun.15, 2010, under Episodes

We’re still here. You can’t get rid of us THAT easily. Geez :P Here’s another gigantimous (listen tot he show for an explanation) episode of Smart Mouths. Join Elysa, Greg, Matt, Micah and Penny for this wonderful piece of journalistic excelle. Erm, good st. Forget that, Journalistic crap.

In this show:
-Greg, Elysa, and Penny recount their White House visit. Elysa is still having a hard time breathing.
-World Cup is ONNN!
-Palin’s new assets?
-Obama and his emotions…which leads to one of the most epic Political Bitch rants EVER.
-Gaga for Alejandro video? Not so much.
-Google that shiiiizzzz is back.
-Backwashes are pretty tame.

UPDATE: Yes, we are (now) aware about the weird voice issues at the end of the show. Nobody else has to tweet, comment, write, call or text us.

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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Smart Mouths #63: Come As You Are

by Penny on Jun.08, 2010, under Episodes

Which podcasts can knowledgeably (or not so knowledgeably) debate the voices of Kermit the Frog versus Fozzy Bear, which McDonald’s character is gay, Middle East politics, and baseball all in one show? Seriously, not many. Luckily we’re a bunch of idiots who have a lot to say on a variety of topics…and you get to listen. Join Andrew, Greg, Matt, Micah and Penny for the latest episode of your favorite trainwreck of a podcast, Smart Mouths!

In this episode:
-RIP, Rue McLanahan
-Perfect baseball game ruined by an ump. Boo!
-Middle East expository
-Sinkhole in Guatamala
-Formspring Fun Segment!
-One long backwash…but such a nice one
-WTF news is back!

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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Smart Mouths #62: Sebastian

by Penny on May.30, 2010, under Episodes

Apparently the death threats have been starting to come in…we’ve been warned that if we don’t release an episode soon our lives will be cut short. Chill out, peeps, we’ve got one for you! It’s a short(er) episode, but no less exciting.
In this episode:
-Andrew’s Birthday…and the story of the stripper…and Andrew’s Eulogy.
-We play an awesome listener created song! :)
-RIP Gary Coleman…another child star gone to soon:(
-Elena Kagan- her nomination may bring about an interesting trend on the Supreme Court
-BP oil spill: Environmental Catastrophe: Ya think?
-TV Finales Galore
-Don’t Ask Don’t Tell on its way to being repealed and Elysa fangirls the president a little
-Backwash: John Green, our horrid pronunciations, and a special follow up to an email from a long time ago.

Thanks for listening, See ya in June!!

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Andrew Sims: The Man, the Myth, the Legend

by Elysa on May.23, 2010, under Announcements

May 23rd doesn’t get enough press. At least, not for the right reasons. Most people know it as the day Napoleon was crowned King of Italy, or the start of the Mexican-American war, or the day Nazi Nutbag Heinrich Himmler committed suicide, or perhaps as International World Turtle Day.

Consequently, too few people grasp its true significance. Too few people understand the magnitude of this date, the utter cosmic totality of its passing. For on this day 21 years ago, evolution reached its pinnacle. All that ever was, from the Big Bang to now, culminated in the birth of Andrew Sims.

I speak for everyone when I say that, without Andrew, none of us would be here with you today. Well fine, maybe – maybe – we would still exist as people, but not as the insanely awe-inspiring podcasters you know us as. It was his vision and talent that started all of these (somewhat disturbing) shows, from MuggleCast to SmartMouths, so the next time we mortally offend your every mature sensibility you can go ahead and thank him.

No seriously. Don’t look at us.

We, as a group, as a dynamic, would not exist without him. Not only because it was his passion for broadcasting and entertainment that initiated this entire shitstorm, but because he believed in the rest of us. He made a name for himself early on, and had his pick of people to share the limelight with. He’s visited movie sets, interviewed New York Times Best-Selling authors, sat down at tables with Hollywood producers and devised History-Making book discussions. He could have shared that with anybody, could have chosen to do his show(s) with anyone. But he chose us. He believed in us. He showed us the ropes, exhibited Saintlike patience throughout, and most impressively, befriended us along the way. He is one of the truest friends in recorded history – I mean seriously, it’s a little fucking sickeningly sweet sometimes – and defines what it is to be fiercely loyal, understanding, and genuine.

When I first met him, five years ago this summer, my first thought was… okay, truthfully it was “how do I tap that?” But then it was, “he’s just so grotesquely easy to like!” And to some degree, to those who know him best, that sums him up perfectly: He’s just one of those people that could run over your cat and you’d invite him in for tea and scones. Maybe that makes him a wizard. But I like to believe that’s just the charisma, the open charm and easy humor he so naturally displays, both professionally and personally. Many of us owe some of our best experiences and memories to his unabashed willingness to selflessly share his own. So much of what we get to do is because of him, and so much of what we know about friendship is due to him.

But above all, even greater than any of those things combined, is his penchant for school hallway pants-shitting. I mean let’s be honest, that’s the real reason we like him.

Happy birthday Andrew, you scintillating piece of man meat! We love you!

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Smart Mouths #61: Will Grayson, Will Grayson with John Green

by Elysa on May.16, 2010, under Episodes

HOLY HELLBASKET, John Green is on Smart Mouths?! Hath hell frozen over? Does Penny love Oprah? Does Elysa hate Glambert? Because this is some earth-shattering, paradigm-shifting, apocalyptic stuff. I repeat: John Green – THE John Green, a legit author, viral phenomenon extraordinaire – is on the show this week to discuss his book Will Grayson, Will Grayson.

Wait – this doesn’t mean we’re earning credibility, does it? No? Okay good.


  • We open the book discussion with a few standard questions – the only time in this interview where we aren’t actively making asses of ourselves.
  • Discussion of the Epic as Hell (minus the fire-and-brimstone) novel is very thematic, with particular focus on the interconnectedness of truth and love.
  • Penny pays Elysa the most profound compliment of her life. And that includes the time Matt called her his ho.
  • Also: How can we be fabulous? John answers with his usual Jedi-like wisdom and wit.
  • Last Words with John Green: A new game in which we guess what celebrities’ last words will be. Up on the pyre: Bill Clinton, Lady Gaga, Barney the Dinosaur… yeah, we go there.

For the whole three people out there who haven’t heard of John the Wise and/or read his novels, check him out. You won’t be disappointed, unless you’ve got a pet peeve against killer writing skillz. His website is http://www.sparksflyup.com/, his awesome youtube is http://www.youtube.com/vlogbrothers and he’s @realjohngreen over on Twitter.

And in special thanks to John for making an appearance on our (let’s be honest) less-than-inspiring production, we’re asking our listeners to donate to his charity of choice: The American Red Cross Nashville Relief Fund . For our part, we’ve already donated $200 – a figure John has graciously offered to match – so let’s play a philanthropic game of Follow the Leader, shall we? Donate Here. Come on now. Don’t be a bitchsqueeler.

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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Smart Mouths #60 LIVE: Gleewash Part Deux

by Penny on May.10, 2010, under Episodes

In honor of episode 60 we had our first LIVE show in a long time! Thanks to Andrew, Greg, Matt, Micah and Penny for this great streaming episode!

-We try (again) to discuss the UK election results….and fail miserably.
-Texting during Sex? 1/10 think its ok.
-Virtual Pitcher gets $1M for a perfect game
-Boycotting Arizona….maybe it’s time to boycott MORE states.
-Net Neutrality- Andrew and Greg discuss…everyone else tries not to drool while they’re sleeping.
-Backwash is Gleeful again…OY.
-Google that Shiz…..with a few twists.
-Listener Calls!

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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Live Show Tonight (Thursday) at 10 pm EST

by Penny on May.06, 2010, under Announcements

Hey All! We made a last minute decision to have a LIVE SHOW for our 60th Episode. The show will be held tonight (Thursday, May 6) at 10 PM EST.

NOTE 1: Enjoy this useful Time Zone Converter to help figure out when the show will air in your neck of the woods.

NOTE 2: If you’re in the UK, you will BE UP ANYWAY since you will want to find out the results of your important election that was held today.

UPDATE: You will be able to listen to the show at this link: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/smart-mouths-live%21

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Smart Mouths #59: The Price You Pay

by Penny on May.03, 2010, under Episodes

We had a great time recording the show this week and we’re sure you’ll have a great time listening. Join Andrew, Elysa, Micah and Penny for a supremely excellent rendition of the Smart Mouths Podcast.

In this episode:
-Announcements cover a John Green, Laura T, and the announcement that the FINAL DATE TO ORDER SMART MOUTHS T-SHIRTS IS MAY 21, 2010
-Sandra Bullock in the news again: she got herself a cute little baby…and we didn’t even know!
-New York Times Square bomb scare!
-Oil Spill in the Gulf of Mexico
-Apple gossip
-The 2010 Time 100 List
-Screw, Marry, Kill returns and its a themed week!
-Backwash gets heated. We’re not gonna lie. Topic of argument: GLEE. Even Matt makes an appearance and he isn’t even on the show
-WTF News covers bees, eels, pigs, dogs, and grandmas.

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Smart Mouths #58: Drunk or Kid

by Penny on Apr.28, 2010, under Episodes

-Announcements about Facebook fanning, t-shirts, @realjohngreen and Audible
– Matt breaks the show down into domestic vs. international
- Sandra Bullock’s husband’s mistress, the SEC and PORN, Ben “sex-offender” Roethlisberger…
- …Immigration Law, Finance Reform, Hitler and Boob Protests
- Plus, what’s France’s deal with Muslim women’s attire and how one girl stung by a deadly jellyfish survived the encounter
- We debut a new segment: Drunk or Kid
- Backwash covers stranded volcano people and NASA funding (Elysa gets a hard-on)
- WTF News: iPad thieves, cookbook misprints, hidden TNT barrels and penile Indonesian military bans

While youtube still has it up, enjoy our Hitler Video.

This podcast is brought to you by Audible.com. Download a free audiobook of your choice today at http://audiblepodcast.com/smartmouths

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